Hello Beauties!
It has been a long time since I've posted anything, due to a lot of inner work and practice. This island, the school and our sweet, little mountain bungalow has become a home for me and it feels so good. Just a couple days ago we got out of a 10 day silent retreat, The Revelation of the Spiritual Heart. A truly impressive experience on many levels. Logan and I slept in different places, ate on our own and didn't interact at all including eye contact. I have never felt so blessed to be still, so relaxed in myself. I woke every morning a 5:30, made my green smoothie and trucked a mile down the hill to the meditation halls. We started the ten days with 7 hours of meditation with 5 minute breaks every hour and worked up to 2 and 3 hour meditations towards the end of the retreat. I would find myself with some anxiety and fear upon entering the longer stints and soon realize - ahhh, it's just me, just God, nothing to fear here. :) The focus was on the Spiritual Heart - the door that each of us holds within our being that connects with the divine. We learned many beautiful techniques and I experienced some purely blissful states, but that was not the real gem in the experience. The gem was the realization that I have this within me, always available and it is like caring home around with me. It is my most essential nature and everything is born and dissolves within it, my ego, my body, my car, the stars and moon. I really could feel how we are completely alone because there is only one - nothing exists outside of this oneness.
Now I am in Mystical Bellydance 2 workshop and feeling quite challenged with the transition. We literally concluded the retreat at 10 pm on Sunday and I started shimming on Monday at 9 am. One of the worst headaches I've ever had followed directly after some pelvic thrusting and horribly loud bollywood music. I was on the verge of dropping out last night but I awoke with a new perspective - SURRENDER.